I have been journaling for years. Remember when we were kids, we kept a diary. At least we girls did and kept them hidden so our brothers wouldn't get a hold of them. So as adults we call it journaling, but in a way it is similar. I am sure many of you have read Frances Robert's book "Come Away My Beloved". Many of my journal enteries are similar where I journaled what I was hearing from Abba's heart. A journal is also a recording of our thoughts, insights, and prayers.
As I select enteries to post, they will be both Abba speaking and my speaking to Abba. They will not be squential. Some may be from as far back as 1980 and some more recent. Some will have a familiar message because I believe we all hear Abba's voice. Others will be more personal from my heart in what I was being challenged with on life's journey. I trust they will encourage you in your journey and confirm that you too hear Abba's speaking."
(I just re-read this entry from Dec. 2016 and it reminded me again of the amazing Love of God and my longing for more of Him.)
Dec. 28, 2016
This morning in reading devotional by Chris Tiegreen, I had a revelation instantly of an answer to my questioning of “feelings” that seem to be ever present. I believe now I understand what it is. I have thought that it was a sadness or emptiness inside since my husband and best friend passed from this life into life eternal.
What is this that I carry with me every day? Why do I not find excitement in things and events that used to bring happiness? Why do I so often feel like I’m just going through something to get through it? One thing I know is that I am not stuck in the process of grieving such a great loss of relationship of one I had for 48 plus years. The last stage of grief is acceptance, which I did several years ago. I have accepted and embraced my life now as being single. I am content with who I am and where I am and know that my life is blessed.
So what was the revelation I received this morning? What I carry is not sadness or loneliness, but in a word it is “longing”. I desire something that is just out of reach. While I have the peace of knowing that I am now in the Kingdom of God and am never alone, I am longing for the day where I will see Him face to face.
Now I know I am not carrying sadness around with me, I will endeavor to have my eyes open wider to see more of the Kingdom right before me now. While I long for that day of full completion and being fully free from the things of earth, I will rejoice in the day, this day that the Lord has made. I will enjoy the life around me whatever the day presents knowing that each day brings me closer to that day that I long for.
Beloved, this is the season of fine tuning. My Spirit is well equipped to clear away the static in your mind. You will hear with more clarity what the Spirit speaks to any who have their heart and mind tuned to the spiritual ralm. It is time for an increased meaure of Spirit filled and fueled power to be reeleased. It is time for my people to rise up with holy boldness reflecting My Glory to defeat all the work of the enemy. Now is the time.
12-07-15 From Abba
Beloved, I am releasing Wisdom and Understanding to My Church. With it comes the responsibility to apply it is circumstances and challenges that each one faces. As you hear My Voice, choose rightly and that which I have spoken will be evident by My Spirit's manisfestation.
(Recently reading old journals and found these even speaking from Abba's Heart again)
Beloved, to be content is to value me above all other things of this life you live. The journey as a pilgrim passing through is intended as a time of preparation for eternity. As my people allow my purpose to be carried out as they walk in the Spirit, the result is that of perfecting. I have said you are to be perfect. What I am looking for is the perfecting of your faith. In the days ahead it will be crucial that your faith in me be steadfast. You must not waver in the circumstances you face. The enemy will seize any opportunity you allow by the wavering of your faith and the direction I have given you. Value me by your passion for my Kingdom and by your abandoned worship.
Beloved, the difference between a smooth path and a rocky one is found in choosing the manner in which to navigate the journey. Keeping your eyes on me and allowing your eye to be single is key. When you fixate on the obstacles, they will cause your foot to stumble and become a detour on your journey. My intention is always for your good. Wisdom will lead you as you use the gifts and abilities I have empowered you with. Stay on the course I have set for you.
January 21, 2010
Your heart cries for my habitation. Know that I hear your cry. Find yourself lost in me and I will satisfy your longing. I will reveal myself to you as I did for Abraham, Moses, and Enoch. Every minute you give me is precious. So many don’t know how close I am within their reach. They chose to reminisce over past experiences rather than receiving fresh bread. Only the soul that quiets before me and waits for me to breakthrough the clutter that fills their thoughts will know my presence. I wait for a precedence to be set for my presence. When I become the main focus, I will be the main event and will do wonders in your midst. For you my child do not become weary. Continue to seek me with all your heart and I will be there.
January 25, 2010
Beloved, My Word today is reach out. The old hymn Reach Out and Touch the Lord as He Walks By only spoke to my people that My Son was only passing through. This thought limits Me in the lives of those I love. I want to embrace and hold close to my heart all who will reach out and take my hand. I will draw you closer and closer and never let go. There is so much I desire for my people, My church, and all I have chosen. My heart grieves when my people only want to touch me as I come into your midst. Those that take hold of me find in me all that they need. My presence diminishes all fears. My Presence embraces you in my Peace and My Glory raises you to new heights in me you have never known.
January 30, 2010
Let it be known that the Wind of My Spirit is ready to blow on all who are seeking me. My desire will be birthed in many. They will desire to know me, to know my ways, to find me in the secret place. I will breath new life on all who hunger and thirst for my righteousness. Many will find my peace and healing will touch the afflicted. Those who have been caught up in this life will stand and see my salvation. They will come out of darkness and into light. Those that know My Peace and walk in peace will affect all around them. Many will come and say “Give us this peace.”. The time will come that it will be futile to look for peace anywhere but from Me.
From Abba's Heart
Beloved, remember it is in quietness and rest you find me. Even though I am always with you, your awareness is sometimes disrupted. I am the life in you that runs in the background like programs on your computer – always there keeping track of your comings, goings, and doings. I am your strength. I am the power in you and when released through you accomplishes the very thing you seek for. Continue to live and walk in my Spirit and see the wonders all around. Listen and learn more of Me. Quiet your soul and know what my good, acceptable, and perfect will is. Holdfast to what my Spirit has revealed. Continue to step out and forward in the anointing I have placed in you.
May 23, 2015
(From Abba's Heart)
Beloved, each day presents itself with opportunities to see my beauty, to hear my voice, to know my love, to seek me and to know my delight. When you delight in me, the very things you long for are yours. What is it you long for? Things of this world are only temporal, but the things of my Kingdom are eternal. Be one who has received all the goodness of who I am. As you go, my goodness will draw others to desire the things of my Kingdom. Righteousness, Peace, and Joy are always available to those who seek me with all their heart. Many try to satisfy the longings with temporal things rather than letting go and letting me be what will satisfy them. Walk with me and know that your life is not fruitless.
(From Abba's Heart)
My Beloved, this day is a day unto itself. Each day of your life may be numbered by time and calendar, but know that your days are eternal and ever recorded in my timeless eternity. Forever you are mine as I am forever yours. I am with you in oneness now. Come away to the secret place of intimacy with me and I will fill your longing. No longer will you feel alone for I am with you and supply all you need. My door is open and bids you to enter into my realm and see My Kingdom in all its glory. Come and drink and eat of my table. You are secure in My Love.
MINUTE TO MOMENT
Time for all of us is measured in seconds, minutes, and hours. Each minute in an hour is a measurement of time. In the sixty minutes in any given hour of our day, how many can we identify as a moment? A moment is something of significance to be remembered. One moment in His Glorious Presence transcends us out of time and into the timeless. Father, I pray that each of us will have Glorious moments with you every day. May each moment be remembered as a gift of love from our Heavenly Father who lives outside of time.
(From Abba's Heart - He spoke and I journaled)
This morning while in the Secret Place with Abba, I heard His Voice. This is what He said. . . Beloved, remember that the seed of faith that I planted in you is raising you to new levels. Know that when faith is coupled with obedience it has the power to change what is to what I have purposed for my people. A time is coming when only active faith will produce the results of what heaven on earth looks like. Many are to comfortable in the measure of faith just believing in me. It is time for faith to believe ON ME and release my Spirit. Truth will stand as the evidence and will prevail against and beyond any reasonable doubt in the minds of any who oppose righteousness. The deceptive work of the enemy will crumble and become his undoing and failure. . . .
I believe this is not just for me, but for all of believers and I declare it!
(From Abba's Heart)
Beloved, I know the plans I have for you and as you put your focus, trust, and full attention on me, you will walk in the right direction and you will find fulfillment in me. Ever since the day of your repentance, your heart has been to walk the right path. Even though salvation and all that it is comes from me, unless one fully repents their journey takes many wrong turns. My heart longs for those who have come under the deception that they can still live for themselves choosing the pleasures and ways of the world and believe all is well with their soul. Did I not say in my Word that loving me all your heart, soul, and mind was the evidence of true devotion and commitment? Yes, Beloved, my heart grieves for the many who half-heartedly serve me. I am a Holy God and in my Kingdom it is all or nothing. My Word is clear but the evil one continues to use the half-hearted for his pleasure and their demise. They are destroying themselves and lead many on the road to destruction with them. Pursue with all diligence my Kingdom and my Righteousness and everything you need for your journey will be supplied. Speak the truth of my Word in the true love you have for me and do not be discouraged when others turn away. When they do, they turn away from me, the only source of a full and abundant life.
(From Abba's Heart speaking to me)
When you hear my voice call you to the secret place you must let go of all else that wants to keep you doing what you are doing. Beloved the secret place is where you and I join our hearts and in those moments we are truly one. I always see us as one. We are one through the blood of the cross. It was there that the wall of darkness came down and let the light of my glory reveal my plan for mankind. It is true that when anyone turns to me the veil is taken away. The veil that separates us was torn by the finished work of the cross, but so many choose to remain separated by the wall of darkness. They choose to eat of the tree of knowledge controlling their own life. When life’s circumstances shake their world and things get out of control, they either walk deeper into the darkness or they choose to turn to me. Because I desire the oneness, I don’t often respond with quick fixes. My plan for all is being joined together with my Son Christ Jesus at the very core of life. My love is so often misunderstood. Love sent Jesus to the cross, but His sufferings began the moment He stepped into His true destiny. The moment the veil is taken away is the moment of decision. The decision determines the journey. Choosing the path of truth and light requires absolute letting go of all that pulls one to turn back to the old life. Many can keep the focus on me for a while when things are going well, but when the journey gets hard they change their focus thus taking their eyes off of me and onto the problems. You, my beloved are learning to keep focus. As you do, you will be drawn to the secret place. I will fortify you in the Spirit to walk in oneness with me more and more. When you hear my voice do not delay for I long to share more of myself with you. My mysteries are being unveiled to any and all who will choose to answer when I call, who will listen to what I speak, and who will carry the anointing to my intended purpose.
(Personal note. My husband and my best friend of forty-eight and half years went to be with the Lord in June of 2009. These entries are from my journal and reflections of my feelings and emotions during the journey through the fog of loss. The Lord is so very gracious and faithful.)
Lord, I’m still unsure of the path I am to walk. I know that ultimately you lead and guide me every day as I listen, follow, and act. I just wonder if I am letting some days or some of the day slip by missing what you may have planned. It seems like I spend a great deal of time alone here at home by myself. Most of the time I’m fine with that. I know when you drop a gem of understanding in my heart of your ways I am to explore it and record it. I still seem to have periods of restlessness. I never want to become isolated, yet there seems to be limited opportunities with others to explore together a deeper insight of your Kingdom. One thing I do know, you are my desire and I love you more than life. Sometimes my heart longs so deeply to step out of this existence into being fully in the Kingdom. I know that I am here yet looking to Jesus who is the author and finisher of my faith. You must have more to accomplish through me here.
(From Abba’s Heart spoken to me)
Beloved, as you seek to understand so many thing, do not get lost in the seeking. Seek me and I will give you the understanding that you need. When the situation is complex there are so many ways to reason things out. But the reasoning of the natural man never brings my wisdom into the very core of the situation. Again I tell you to trust and rest in me. Do not get caught up in situations I have not assigned you to fix or needs to be met. Only follow the leading of the Holy Spirit and you will know when and where to respond.
Lord, you always seem to amaze me and never disappoint me. How can I ever wonder what lies ahead. No matter what, you orchestrate it for what is best for me. I asked and you gave me mornings again without sadness. Life does seem to present seasons. Some last longer than others, but I am living this life fully blessed knowing you lead me and give me the wisdom to carry out whatever you direct me to.
(From Abba’s Heart spoken to me)
Beloved, the deep yearning and longing for the things of My Kingdom causes the desire for things of earth to fade. As you hunger and thirst for My Kingdom, do not become discontent. I still have a plan and purpose for the advancement of My Kingdom on earth. Your struggle comes to all who desire me more than their life. You can only see a little part of what your life lived in me and in my love produces. Receive my glory when those whose lives you affect honor you. Their words of encouragement and honor come from my heart. Humility is not produced by denying your fruitfulness. It is produced by the heart and its recognition of my workings in and through you. Receive my blessings, My Child.
Lord, I have so much to thank you for. You have blessed me with life—this life and kept me the last two plus years of adjusting to this “now” normal. I am beginning to grasp again that the assignment and path for the journey is at this time a day by day. Where ever I am, you are. You are ever with me. I want you more than anything else in this life. But while I still live here, I want to be in the center of your will. Thank you for keeping me in the center of your heart. May I always keep you in the center of my heart.
Selected Journal Entries
April 7, 2003
The heart of the Father would beckon us to know His heart and His longings for His people. He stands ever longing for a people who will hear His voice and obey.
The Spirit of the Lord says, "Be a people of truth. Be a people who will give themselves as one who loabors. One who will work in the vineyards, one who will work in the fields, one who will put his hand to the plow and not look bak. One who will by their very life be the stones used by the master to rebuild the what has been torn down. My Kingdom cannot be built by human hands--but I can build it with human hearts given fully to the Spirit's workings. The very foundation of this nation has been desecrated and can only be restored by a people of truth. My Spirit has said that the requirements is truth in your inward parts. Only by a broken and contrite spirit will the materials be suitable for rebuilding. Hear the cry of my heart My people, My chosen. Return to Me, seek Me with your whole heart. I long to restore this nation to its original design. A nation whose moral fiber was woven with the principles of My Word and My Kingdom. I must have a people of such moral charater. A people void of the facade of truth. A people sold out without compromise. A people who love Me more than life."
July 3, 2002 (While soaking at prayer meeting)
While laying before the Lord in quiet worship I sensed a longing to go deeper. Yet, I felt that something was holding me back or like I was missing something. I asked the Lord for insight. I saw a catus and wondered if it represented me. This is what I heard the Lord say.
You, my child, are like the catus in the desert. You drink from a deep well and store it for a time appointed by me for you to be a refreshing to those who are thirsty. Many come to you when you don't even know that they are being refreshed by what flows from you. Never lose sight of the calling upon you. Never doubt the giftings I have placed in you. There are times and seasons for your ministries. Be content and dring, drink, drink. You need to keep yourself full of my living water.